


remember to breathe deep

by arrows



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Art School, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friendship, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-30
Updated: 2017-04-19
Packaged: 2018-10-12 18:49:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10497312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrows/pseuds/arrows
Summary: It’s Carey’s turn to contemplate all of this now; she taps her fingers staccato against her leg, and Magnus watches. “How about — if I do this, and I ask out K, you gotta go for it with Taako, too.”All Magnus wants is for his friends to be happy. He agrees immediately. “It’s a deal!”“High five me. Right now.”(Or: Magnus makes a bet, and gets more than he expected.)





	1. Chapter 1

Class has been in session for less than five minutes, and there’s already a professor screaming at a student on the other side of the room.

Magnus, standing dumbstruck in the doorway, is telling himself that it’s bound to at least be an _interesting_ class, if only to avoid freaking out. The teacher seems otherwise pretty nice, just frustrated; her arms are thrown up in the air and she seems about two seconds from storming out of the room. Probably just having a rough day. He’s been there.

“ _Fine_ , Taako,” she snaps, and Magnus’ gaze shifts towards the kid on the other side of this screaming match. Taako’s short and lithe and not all that intimidating, and it would be easy to think the yelling was unprovoked if not for the look on his face — a smirk that seems as if it could start a small war with this professor right now, and perhaps even _win_ it. All stubbornness and snark in the set of his raised eyebrows. It’s no surprise the teacher has given into whatever it is he’d asked; Magnus is pretty sure he’d melt under the weight of those eyes, too. “But _please,_ for the love of God, take this seriously, for once.”

Taako shoots fingerguns at the professor, says something Magnus can’t quite make out, and darts across the room, out of view. Magnus isn’t about to spew some bullshit about love at first sight (he’s been there before, and he knows where it goes — it doesn’t end well), but he’ll admit that he’s _curious_.

Golden light from spot-lamps makes the room glow warmly; they’re directed at the stand in the center of the room, presumably for the model to pose on. Magnus makes his way towards the front, weaving between benches with a unique blend of clumsiness and grace as he looks around. Canvases hang from the ceiling on hooks, and the half-finished pieces scrawled across them already look better than anything Magnus could hope to accomplish here.

It’s the beginning of the spring semester, but Magnus seems to be the only new student in the class, and his supply box is gripped tight to his chest as he searches for a bench to sit on. Painting is really, honestly, completely _not_ his thing — he’s a sculptor, and he’s damn good at that, can carve wood like nobody’s business, but put him near a pencil or a brush and he’s utterly useless.

Curriculum says he needs a painting credit, though, and so here he is, gingerly setting his things down next to a green haired girl. Her canvas is turned towards the girl next to her rather than to the model stand, and she introduces herself as Carey, the girl beside her as Killian. Magnus stumbles over his introduction in a way that’s awkward even for _him_.

Before he can make things any worse, the professor is adjusting the lights and a figure is stepping up onto the model stand, back turned to the audience of art students. Magnus occupies himself with setting up his supplies, paints laid out on the palette in just the right order. If he has to do this, he’s going to give it his best try, at least — with a firm set to his lips and a brush in his hand, he turns back to the model and prepares to work.

There, on the model stand, robe dropping to the ground, is Taako. Magnus drops his brush on the ground immediately.

He’s grateful to the low lighting of the room for disguising the red that he’s _sure_ is cropping up on his cheeks. Whether the blush is because this is his first figure painting class (true) or because of _who_ the model is is anyone’s guess — he sure as hell hopes people assume the former, because _he’s_ not even sure. The vague curiosity he’d had towards Taako earlier has gone entirely out the window and been replaced with who-knows-what.

A bit of a scramble ensues to pick up the dropped brush, and he’s almost afraid to look back up. The initial shock of it isn’t quite as jarring after a moment, but it doesn’t help that Taako is right in front of him, the front row bench proving a bad choice in the face of Taako posing Kate-Winslet-draw-me-like-one-of-your-French-girls style.

Magnus pushes that away. He’s rather not make anything more embarrassing than it needs to be — he’s sure he’ll have plenty of time for that later; charm isn’t quite his strong suit, unless you count a knack for rustic hospitality. No one seems to have noticed his initial reaction; better to keep it that way.

He’s good at getting lost in woodworking, carving something out of a blank slate; he forces his mind to treat painting in the same way and go blank as his brush moves across the canvas. It isn’t too difficult once he gets into the swing of it, capturing Taako’s dark braids tied into a loose bun, his freckled skin tinged gold by the lights. There’s no way Magnus is portraying how ethereal Taako looks, but that’s alright. It seems impossible to reproduce on canvas anyways.

(He firmly ignores the way Taako’s gaze seems to be glued to him, and how he’s fairly sure Taako winks a few times, and that little smirk on his face.)

By the end of the two-hour class, his painting is hardly more than a sketch, and looks hardly anything like Taako, but he isn’t entirely unsatisfied with it. That’s something, he thinks.

——

“I’m _not_ blushing.”

Magnus’ elbow shoots out to nudge at Carey’s side, hard enough to earn a surprised yelp from her and a glare from their professor. It’s been a few weeks since that first class, and Magnus has learned a few things.

First, is that Carey is like, _super_ nice. A little intimidating at first, but they’ve sat together through every class so far, and she’s incredibly easy to talk to. Magnus has been told that a person’s paintings can tell you a lot about them (though, if true, he’s not sure what his say about him, aside from that he’s a _mess_ ) — Carey’s paintings are colorful and bright. She can do detail like no one else Magnus knows, but most of her work, before it narrows down into hyperfocused areas, is broad strokes (all impatience, but Magnus can understand that). Magnus thinks it reflects her pretty well, though he couldn’t say how.

Second thing he’s learned is that Taako? Is _not_ the usual nude model for their class. Through Carey (who has quickly become his main source of gossip and information) he’s discovered that Taako is a junior at the school, and has been bugging the professor to let him model for _years,_ until she finally gave in. Hence, the first class. Hence, Carey teasing Magnus for blushing when Taako walks past.

His voice turns to a hushed whisper, and he refuses to turn his head from his canvas, lest Carey see that he’s _definitely_ lying when he repeats his statement with an emphasized “I’m _not_.”

She gives him an exasperated look that says _sure, Magnus, sure_ , but before she can say anything else, it’s time to work. _Thank god,_ Magnus thinks, with a certain fondness to it — he's not good at being genuinely irritated by his friends.

Taako’s sitting directly in front of Magnus today. He's small enough and hunched over his canvas enough that it doesn't present any problems with Magnus seeing the model, but it does present other issues: namely, Magnus keeps peeking at what Taako is painting, and at Taako himself, rather than work on his own piece. His attention span is currently as short as that of his pet goldfish. Magnus is hardly sure of what the model today looks like, but by a half hour into class he's memorized the way Taako’s braids are falling across his back and how his crop top contrasts with his skin.

What started as mere curiosity has quickly morphed into a full-blown crush, and Magnus _hates_ it.

It takes an hour of this for Carey to nudge his side and give him a capital-L Look, one that he's come to interpret as _You okay, dude?_ but that could just as easily mean _You’re being obvious as fuck, bro, chill your heart boner._ Wide eyes shoot to Carey as he mouths _save me_ , gaze blinking between Taako and Carey as his friend tries to hold back her laughter.

“Have you even _talked_ to him, Mags?”

Magnus shakes his head at the whispered question, and earns an eye roll from Carey.

“I — uh — _hey_ ,” and now he's defensive, though his voice stays low. “You, you can't judge me for _shit_.”

“Yeah?”

“Have you asked out Killian yet?”

The look on her face tells Magnus he's right, even if he immediately regrets turning this around on her, unspoken apology springing to his lips and getting caught there before it can enter the air. It had to be done, he reasons. For the greater good. Yeah. Something like that.

Class ends. He holds the door open for Taako on his way out and is rewarded with a smile that makes his heart do a little flip-flop in his chest.

——

The scene: Magnus’ bedroom, Magnus and Carey sitting on his bed, a bottle of wine being passed between them. Magnus is just this side of tipsy; for his height and size, you’d think he’d have a better tolerance for the stuff, but just a couple swigs in and his mind is pleasantly fuzzy.

Carey’s at about the same point, cross-legged next to Magnus and talking about Killian — Magnus could swear she looks exactly like the heart-eyes emoji. This has become a Saturday night ritual for the two of them over the past two months. It’s easy to lounge around with evening light coming through the windows and talk about their crushes like a bunch of eighth graders.

It’s harder, clearly, to actually _act_ on them.

“She’s just so — perfect? She’s perfect. I was at the gym with her the other day and I almost _died_. Did you know she likes ducks?”

“That’s, uh, that’s really specific.”

“ _Ducks_ . I’ve been looking for duck-related shit to get her for _weeks_. Where do you even get duck shit?”

“I could, uh — I could help you? Make her something? Like — I dunno, I can do carpentry, I’m sure we could figure something out? A, um, a duck-shaped box or something? Maybe? A romantic gesture!” Tipsy-Magnus only stumbles around his words a bit more than usual-Magnus, but his phrases are interspersed with giggles, which is a bit less ordinary.

“Nah, nah, it’s cool, you don’t gotta. I prob’ly wouldn’t give it to her, anyway.”

Magnus takes a second to think, staring down at the goldfish bowl on his windowsill. His fish, Steven, swims in it without a care, oblivious to human relationship issues. Seems nice.

From what he can gather, Carey and Killian have been friends for nearly a year, and almost-dating for pretty much the whole time. There’s no question (in Magnus’ half-drunk mind) that Killian likes her back. It’s obvious.

“Why not?”

“I mean, it’s complicated. ‘S’not that easy.”

“Sure it is! Valentine’s day is soon, right — I could help you make her something, and you could give it to her then.”

It’s Carey’s turn to contemplate all of this now; she taps her fingers staccato against her leg, and Magnus watches. “How about — if I do this, and I ask out K and make her something, you gotta go for it with Taako, too.”

All Magnus wants is for his friends to be happy.

He agrees immediately.

“It’s a deal!”

“High five me. Right now.”

And so they seal the agreement with a high five, and Magnus doesn’t even think to regret it until later.

——

He wakes in the morning and has a blissful moment of ignorance before remembering the deal they’d made the night before.

Then the panic sets in.

Magnus is used to rushing into things. It’s a skill-slash-curse that’s gotten him into as much trouble as it’s done good, but he’s used to rushing into _other_ things. He throws himself into fights (only to protect others, never for himself) without a second thought, but in personal relationships he tends to be far more cautious — his heart’s been closed off for a while, now, and he didn’t really expect that to change. A crush is something he can deal with, and he’s got endless love for his friends, anyways — but being forced to act on his feelings? That’s not so great.

For a second, he thinks about taking it back. His phone is in his hands, the beginning of a text typed out, a ‘ _H_ _ey idk if that dare was a great idea?? Like you can ask out k without my help right i believe in u’_ . And then he thinks about Carey — the smile on her face when they’d high fived, how she’d practically _glowed_ with confidence, and he thinks of her _happiness_ , and he can’t.

Carey’s quickly become one of the most important people in Magnus’ life, and his sense of loyalty and honor can’t let him go back on their deal.

“ _Fuck_.” It feels like a weight off his shoulders just to say the word aloud, even if Steven is his only audience (and the fish, predictably, gives no response).

Dating Taako isn’t exactly something he’d object to — but the steps in-between here and there seem endless, impossible to navigate, daunting as all hell. It’s been a few years since he’s had to start a relationship — the last time was Julia, junior year of high school, but they’d been family friends for much, much longer than they’d been together. Julia had asked him out first. He has no experience in this.

But he _has to_.

Or, at least — a plan starts to take shape, slowly, and it makes Magnus’ gut churn a little with guilt, but it seems like it’d _work_. Carey just has to think Magnus and Taako are dating. He’s an awful liar, but maybe, maybe if he explains to Taako — has him play along, just for a week or two, just for long enough for Carey and Killian to get together, and then — well, he’ll cross the 'and then' bridge when he gets there.

It might work.

It’s terrible, and far too untruthful for his tastes — but it’s better, a little, than actually having to ask out Taako. _That_ thought makes Magnus far more anxious than the former.

He can do this.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus talks to Taako.

The few days before his next painting class are spent with bated breath — and exhausting mental acrobatics in attempts to justify the plan to himself. Magnus has made at least five pros-cons lists, all coming out just about even. Pros: Carey will be happy. Cons: Taako might think it's weird, or Magnus might make a fool of himself, or it might go very badly. (The two sides weigh equal, against all odds.)

Worst case scenario, Taako says no. Their deal had only been to _ask_ Taako, not to succeed, so it still counts, even if he’s met with rejection. Magnus’ own heart is another deal, of course — there’s a teeny tiny chance he’ll be just a _little bit_ devastated — but Carey will still ask out Killian, and Killian will say yes.

Maybe that is the best case scenario, after all. The alternative (Taako saying yes, fake-dating Magnus for a few weeks, and then fake-breaking up) feels even less appealing. His stomach turns at the thought of having to pretend like that.

Magnus circles back a few times to what would happen if he _actually_ asked Taako out, but in every imaginable scenario, it goes badly. It may not be kinder to his heart for it to all be faked, but this way, he can try to build up some walls.

Well. That’s the theory, at least.

Carey and Killian are engrossed in conversation when he walks into the classroom, so instead of taking his usual spot at Caey’s side, Magnus looks around for Taako. He’s found sitting on the opposite side of the classroom, lit by the glow of his phone. Oblivious to Magnus’ racing heart and sweaty palms in the doorway.

Feeling incredibly uncoordinated, Magnus makes his way over to Taako. Smiles a little. Sits down. (Step one, complete.)

“Uh, hey.” Clumsy greeting, a bit louder than he means it to be. Step two, sorta successful.

Taako’s head whips around, braids flying into his face, before his gaze lands on Magnus, face relaxing in a way that makes it clear it’s a conscious effort to look like he didn’t jump at the voice. “Me? Okay, yeah, no one else around, definitely me. Hey! Uh. Mango?”

Magnus laughs, a bright and clear sound (and he can practically feel Carey’s eyes on him from across the room, encouraging). “Magnus, actually. Pretty close, though! You’re Taako, right?”

“Yep, that’s me, homie. You sure it’s not Mango? Like, I snuck a peek at the roster and shit, and I coulda _sworn_.”

They’re both smiling, and something in Magnus’ heart squeezes a little, equal parts discomfort and joy. “Ninety percent sure.”

“Huh.” Taako shrugs, like he was _really positive_ of that, but that grin is still playing at the edges of his mouth. Magnus occupies himself with setting up his painting supplies so he won’t stare too much — a cup of water, palette arranged in rainbow order, canvas propped up ahead of him.

“Not to pry or anything,” though Taako’s tone makes it seem that not prying is merely an afterthought to seem semi-polite, not a heartfelt sentiment (not that Magnus minds), “but you usually sit over yonder with Carey, right?” Both pairs of eyes shoot over to the girl in question, completely captivated by Killian, leaning way into her space. Taako backtracks. “Oooo-kay — I was _gonna_ ask what’s up with you skedaddling over here, but okay, yeah, I think I got it. Taako’s got eyes.”

This is the moment Magnus should ask, he thinks. It’d be easy as hell — _oh, actually, it’s related to that_ , he’d say, and then _I need a favor._ Simple.

He’s absolutely, positively, one hundred percent sure he’d manage to fuck it up.

Instead, he just nods. Runs a hand through his short hair. “Yeah, uh. I figured I’d give her some space to talk to Killian, y’know?”

“I got you, my man. Feel free to skip over here whenever you wanna not third wheel.”

“I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks.”

The class passes in relative silence once the model is set up, with Taako leaning over to make the occasional comment. It’s a comfortable kind of quiet. Magnus is a little surprised at how well they click — but the knowledge that he’s going to make it awkward, at some point, sends his anxiety into a tailspin, mind racing even as hands stay steady on his paintbrush.

At the end, when Taako is about to leave, Magnus reaches out and stops just short of touching his arm. It seems like a bad idea the moment Taako’s eyes land on him, questioning, but Magnus forces the words out. Now or never.

“I, uh — okay, this might be awkward. Scratch that. It’s definitely awkward. But — okay, so, I made a bet, sort of, with Carey? It’s, uh — basically, the deal was, if she’s gonna ask out Killian, I have to, uh, ask someone out, too. As like, a support type thing? I guess?”

He’s floundering, and Taako doesn’t seem like he totally gets it. Fair. Magnus doesn’t quite get it, himself. He’s not sure what made this seem like a good idea.

“So, you can definitely say no, and it’s no big deal — and not, like, a real thing, don’t worry, just — could you just, uh, pretend? To date me? _God_ , that sounds weird — just for a week, tops, I promise.”

His cheeks are heating up, and he’s sure it’s noticeable. The urge to cover his face with his hands is strong, but he resists; looks down at Taako and _prays_ this will work.

“Oh!” Magnus still can’t tell what Taako is thinking, but thankfully, he keeps talking. “Okay, okay, lemme get this straight — it’s like, a Ten Things I Hate About You-style, you have to date someone before she can ask out her person, type thing? I got that right?”

“Uh, yeah, sorta.”

“Hm. Alright. Alright, alright, alright. What do I get out of it?”

Magnus hadn’t really anticipated this — for all he’d gone over the conversation in his head, most of the scenarios he’d envisioned included Taako immediately saying no. This is further than he thought he’d get.

“I’ll, uh, buy you food? Or pay you, if you really want? I mean, we don’t have to, uh, actually go out, or anything — but if you want coffee or anything, I can grab it for you on the way to class. It’ll probably help make it seem more real, anyways. I think.”

Taako considers it, and shrugs, and quirks his lips up into a smirk. “Free coffee _and_ helping a classmate find true love? Sure, I’m in.”

He sounds like he’s more interested in the free coffee, but Magnus wasn’t expecting selflessness here.

Magnus releases a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, and smiles. “Okay — great, thank you!” Hand swipes through his hair again — it’s a little sweaty, which ruins his half-formed plan of sealing it with a handshake or a high-five (though, really, he’s not sure _how_ you’re supposed to end a conversation like this — a handshake seems too formal, but he doesn’t think this is the sort of thing you can search up on wikihow and find an answer to). He shoves both hands in his pockets, and figures that’s good enough.

“So, how do you wanna do this, my dude? Like, I should probably give you my number, right — we can plan, or meet up later, or something.”

“Plan?”

“Well, _duh_ — unless you want it to be, like, _completely_ unconvincing. C’mon, homeslice.”

“Okay, that makes sense. Yeah, hang on—” Magnus goes to tug his phone out of his pocket, but (in a probable act of karma) drops it on the ground instead. _Smooth!_

Taako grabs onto his hand before he can lean down to grab his phone, and, producing a gold pen seemingly out of thin air, scribbles some digits across Magnus’ skin. His blush most certainly returns — Magnus can picture his face right now, and in his mental image of it it’s as red as a little cartoon heart emoji. If Taako notices, he doesn’t say anything. The pen disappears back into Taako’s shirt pocket, and Magnus just catches his “later, Mango!” before he darts out the door.

His hand still feels warm where Taako touched it as he picks up his phone. And as he walks out of the building. And for the rest of the day.

This is seeming more and more like an awful idea, and yet — Magnus can’t seem to make himself regret it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> — comments fuel me! constructive criticism is welcome. come talk to me at [dealwarlock on tumblr](http://dealwarlock.tumblr.com).  
> — new chapter next wednesday, featuring more carey/killian.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Double date!

“Hey, Killian!”

Across the cafeteria, Carey sees Magnus give her a thumbs up as she jogs over to Killian. She's not  _ nervous _ , that ain't her style, but this is something she's been building up to for months, and she might be a little shaky. Like, her hands are  _ definitely  _ shaking a little.

But she's definitely not nervous.

She clenches her hands into fists and shoves them into her pockets as Killian greets her (with a smile that just about makes Carey’s heart fucking explode before she can even ask anything). There’s something about Killian that makes Carey feel eternally two seconds away from a heart attack, but that isn’t as bad as it sounds. Like the sensation of being just before that first drop on a roller coaster, peeking over the edge of the hill ahead — it’s exhilarating. Sort of nauseating, but exhilarating nonetheless.

Tuning back into the conversation at hand, Killian’s talking about some movie she wants to see — Carey definitely spaced out when she said the name of it, and is now trying to guess from context clues, but honestly, she’s got nothing. She’s more of a ‘watch Indiana Jones reruns on TV’ type than a ‘keep up with all the latest films’ type, and she has no clue what Killian’s talking about, just that Killian is excited about it, and that’s enough to make Carey excited, too.

“Hey, K,” she interjects, before Killian can go through an entire play-by-play of the trailer. “Wanna go see it together? This weekend?”

The moment feels monumental. It isn’t as if Carey and Killian haven’t gone to the movies together before, but Carey has the added weight of knowing it’ll be a  _ date  _ this time.

“Yeah, sure!” Killian seems far less impacted than Carey would have expected. It’s only then that Carey realizes — the context of the question at hand is only immediately clear to people who have an inside look at Carey’s brain, and for all her friend’s talents, she’s pretty sure Killian isn’t a mind reader.

God, this is harder than she’d expected.

“Wait, wait, lemme backtrack real quick. Killian. Killllllian.” She’s stalling, and she knows it. “Would you like to — uh — go see it with me,  _ with-me _ -with-me, as a date?”

Realization dawns on Killian’s face, and there’s an agonizing moment of silence before she breaks into a grin. “Yeah. Definitely.”

“Cool! That’s — that’s great. Cool.” For all her stumbling, Carey does have a matching smile on her face. She kind of wants to kiss Killian. That would definitely, for sure be taking it too fast, and she doesn’t want to risk it, but the temptation is absolutely there — and there, too, is the knowledge that it might actually be  _ possible  _ one day soon, which brings a little flutter to her heartbeat.

——

There's been guilt at the lie nudging at Magnus’ heart all day, but right now, it's all but disappeared.

He's at Carey’s place, helping her redye her hair; his hands are covered in turquoise so thoroughly it's like — well, he’d say it’s like some kind of weird inverted blood, but that’d just be morbid, so he’s going with paint. It’s like paint. Sort of fitting. Carey sits in front of him as he fixes up the back of her hair.

“So.” He already knows how it went — he’d left the room after the beginning of the conversation, only present to give Carey a little confidence to run with, but the grin that’s been on Carey’s face since he arrived is a dead giveaway. Still, he asks, teasing: “Did Killian accept your declaration of undying love?”

He can practically  _ feel  _ her rolling her eyes, even with her back turned to him.

“No declarations here, big guy, but she  _ did  _ agree to go to the movies with me this weekend.” 

Carey’s trying so hard to seem chill, but the words raise into a near-squeal towards the end of the sentence, and Magnus can’t hold back his smile.

The moment is a little bit ruined when Carey follows that up with “Hey, you and  _ your  _ boyfriend should come with. Double date stylez, with a z!” And, well. Magnus probably should have expected this. In retrospect, he definitely should have seen this coming when they’d made the bet. For sure.

Hindsight is 20/20, and all that.

He’s careful not to take a suspiciously long time to reply, but he can’t help how nervous he sounds. “Yeah, uh, that sounds fun. Yeah!”

It’s not even halfway convincing to his own ears, but Carey’s practically floating with how happy she is over this whole Killian thing, so he doesn’t expect her to notice. If she does, she doesn’t say anything about it.

Their conversation continues as Magnus plots out how best to ask Taako — this hadn’t exactly been in the initial agreement, and he isn’t sure how Taako will respond, but Magnus can always fib something about Taako having plans if he needs to. The thought of  _ another  _ lie isn’t a pleasant one, but he can handle it.

If Carey’s gigantic heart-eyes as she talks about Killian are any indication, he’s made the right choice with all of this. He can live with a few lies if it means his friend will be this happy.

——

— Hey, it’s Magnus!

— Thanks again for agreeing to this, I really appreciate it

—  _ heyyyyy mango!!! what is UP my man _

—  _ jsyk i have u saved in my phone as mango w a heart emoji _

—  _ really sellin this whole dating thing _

— Haha, nice!

— Ok, question for you:

— …….……. _ my dude ur takin forever to type what is it _

— Carey asked if we’d maybe possibly do a double date with her and Killian?? If you don’t want to that’s fine ofc

—  _ ok two things. #1 stop usin capital letters in texts what is this the 1700s _

—  _ #2 of course i’ll double date isnt that the entire point of this whole thing???? cmon mango  _

— I mean. I guess? I didn’t expect any actual double dates to happen, tbh

—  _ i change my mind im not dating u unless u stop bein all FORMAL in texts what is WRONG WITH U _

— *fake dating

—  _ whatevs _

— ok less formal are you happy now?

—  _ ecstatic my dude _

—  _ kk i’m in _

— cool!!! thank you!!!

— i’ll pick you up at 7 on saturday?

—  _ sounds peachy _

—  _ [kiss emoji] see u then bf _

— see you then! :^)

——

There’s a little problem with this, and that problem is as follows: Magnus doesn’t really know how to date.

It’s been a couple years since his thing with Julia — and don’t get him wrong, that relationship had been great, but they’d been best friends before they’d been anything more. The kissing and pet names and everything else had been second to their friendship, and the friendship was the easiest thing in the world to return to once they’d moved apart for college and broken up. With Taako, he’s navigating the start of a friendship simultaneously with the start of a relationship, albeit a fake one, and that’s some tricky shit that he’s entirely unprepared for.

Taako, on the other hand, is as effortless in this as he seems to be in everything. 

They have one more painting class together before the double date, and Taako is right next to him as soon as Magnus walks in the room, shooting him a wink before going on tiptoes to kiss his cheek. All class, Taako calls him  _ darling  _ and  _ sweetheart _ , and all class Magnus has to duck his head and hide his blushing cheeks. He spies Carey looking over at him and makes a show of rolling his eyes. Taako notices, too, and leans just a bit further into Magnus’ space, whispers something in his ear — “Think this is working?” Magnus nods.

The truth of the matter is, Magnus has no idea if it’s working or not. Taako reaches over to put a hand on his arm or lean against his side a few times over the next several hours, kisses Magnus on the cheek, uses ridiculous petnames. Magnus, on his part, is too nervous to respond with the same excitement. He’s never been a great liar. The one time he does try, faux-casually, to put an arm around Taako’s shoulders, the momentary surprised flinch from the other man makes Magnus drop his arm almost immediately. He makes a mental note to talk about boundaries later.

It seems like it’s becoming a bit of a trend to stop Taako with a hand on his arm as they get up to leave the classroom, but rather than the confused look it had earned him the first time, he gets an easy “What’s up, honeypie?” in return. (That might be  _ worse _ .)

“Walk with me, maybe?” Magnus holds his arm out and smiles at Taako, only a little nervously. It’s an improvement.

“Sure thing, homie.” Taako links arms with Magnus breezily, and waits until they’re out of the room before asking the real question. “What’s shakin’?”

“We need to talk about, uh,” and Magnus glances down at their linked arms and then back up at Taako, struggling to find the words. “Personal space? I guess?”

Taako’s arm drops from Magnus’ in a flash, and Magnus hurries to clarify. “No, no, I mean, it’s fine! I’m good with, uh, everything you’ve been doing. Really!” Taako doesn’t seem convinced. “Fuck, no, I just meant, like — we should clear up, y’know, what we’re each okay with. Before the double date tomorrow. I don’t, uh, wanna do anything to make you uncomfortable?”

A few moments pass and the silence drags on, and Taako is staring at Magnus like he’s got two heads. “...Taako? Is there paint on my face or something?”

“No, just.  _ Jesus _ . You’re abso-fuckin’-lutely precious, my man. I mean,  _ you’re  _ the one who suggested this whole thing, you shouldn’t have to worry about making me uncomfortable, right?”

“Of course I’m worried about that!”

“Right. Right, of course. Totally! Anyways, doesn’t matter — I’m down for anything. Like, seriously. Whatever you need, dude, Taako’s there.”

“Oh. Okay! I just — we should have some way to say, like, if either of us gets uncomfortable. How about… sour cream?”

Taako squints. “Is that a taco joke?” Before Magus can defend himself (it wasn’t, really, he’s just hungry), Taako continues, face splitting into a grin: “Because if so, I’m all about it. Sour cream, got it.”

Taako holds his hand up for a high-five, and Magnus can’t hold back his smile as he obliges. 

——

Magnus can’t focus on the movie.

It’s loud and there’s explosions but his entire world has narrowed down to one thing: Taako’s hand, holding his own in between their seats.

It’s  _ embarrassing _ , how something as small as hand holding is undoubtedly making him blush in the darkened theatre — he’s a twenty year old in college, not a middle schooler, and this should  _ not  _ be so nerve-wracking.

And yet.

He’s been trying hard to let his crush on Taako fade — it feels more than a little like he’s taking advantage of Taako with this whole fake dating deal, considering he’s actually got  _ feelings _ for the guy, so crushing the crush seems the only option. It’s been easy enough to push that back to focus on helping Carey and Killian, but now, with Carey and Killian right next to them and nothing else to focus on, Magnus’ entire awareness has been condensed to Taako’s hand in his.

Suddenly, about an hour into the movie (though Magnus still has no idea what’s going on onscreen), Taako’s hand leaves, moves to rummage around in his bag instead. A moment later, Taako’s elbow nudges Magnus’ side, murmurs “Want some?” and holds out a tub of what looks like fancy, gourmet ice cream.  _ Huh _ .

Magnus shakes his head, though the food smuggling is more endearing than strange, and Taako shrugs, kicks his feet up on the chair in front of him and leans against Magnus’ side, head resting on his shoulder as he digs into the ice cream.

Magnus firmly ignores the butterflies fluttering in his chest, but still doesn’t quite manage to focus on the screen in front of him. Instead, his attention seems glued to the feeling of Taako’s hair against the side of his face, and the warmth of Taako’s laugh when something amusing happens onscreen.

It’s in this moment that Magnus realizes he’s completely, totally, one hundred percent fucked.

Crushing at a distance is one thing. He could have made heart-eyes at Taako from across the room twice a week in painting class all year, and no one (except, probably, Carey) would have been the wiser. Being  _ this close _ , though — it’s something else entirely.

At the realization, Magnus is torn between wanting to run out of the room and not look back and the urge to stay here forever. Neither is a feasible option. There’s nothing to rush into here, and that leaves Magnus floundering for options where there are none, searching for a way to make this less of a  _ thing _ . He’s already sped past the point of no return, both in the fake relationship and the all-too-real crush, and it seems he’s now simply along for the ride in a pre-plotted adventure straight to nowhere.

Somewhere in the midst of Magnus’ panicking, the movie comes to an end. He only realizes this when Taako’s head is suddenly no longer on his shoulder, and he looks up to see a long list of credits rolling across the screen, and Carey and Killian holding hands as they wait for the other duo at the end of the aisle.

“Earth to Maggie, hel- _ lo _ ,” says Taako, snapping his fingers in front of Magnus’ face. Magnus scrambles to stand up.

“Sorry, sorry. Uh. Good movie, huh?” He doesn’t know if it was actually good or not, but Taako smiles, shrugs and grabs onto his hand and drags him out of the theater after Carey and Killian.

Taako kisses him on the cheek before they part ways, leaving a big purple lipstick smudge that Magnus can’t seem to wipe off no matter how he tries. (He isn’t trying very hard.) When he arrives home, he looks at it in the mirror for a few minutes, a goofy grin on his face that proves equally difficult to wipe away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this chapter is a couple days late from the usual wednesday update schedule! 
> 
> as usual, constructive criticism is welcome, comments fuel me, and if you wanna chat you can find me on tumblr @ [dealwarlock](http://dealwarlock.tumblr.com)! thanks for reading, and i'll have a new chapter up next week (hopefully on time this time!)


	4. Chapter 4

A blank canvas sits in front of Magnus, and he can’t help but feel like it’s mocking him with its emptiness. He’s got no ideas for his midterm painting; his mind swims with thoughts, but can’t seem to land on a solid plan. It’s frustrating as all hell.

Even more frustrating is the more literal mocking coming from his phone. The screen lights up every few seconds with another text from Julia.

He definitely, definitely shouldn’t have told her about his Taako problems.

Magnus doesn’t regret sharing with her, exactly. He’s been in dire need of a friend, and Julia’s the best friend he’s ever had; he doesn’t often go to her with his problems, but she’s there for him when he does, and he returns the favor as much as possible. They work well together. But she’s got a penchant for mocking him in a way that’s both loving and incredibly annoying, and she’s putting that talent to good use.

—  _ mags r u FOR REAL telling me u FAKE ASKED OUT the boy you REAL have a crush on _

—  _ im not that surprised thats Very You but hoooooly shit maggie _

—  _ ur in LOVE _

—  _ i WILL be ur disney-hercules-style muse forcing u to admit ur feelings. u cant escape this maggie!!!! [smiling devil emoji] _

—  _ maaaaaaaags dont stop replying to me thats RUDE _

—  _ ignoring me wont change that ur in looOOOOoooOooOOoooOOOove _

— jules you know i love u but i’m turning my phone off Bye

Julia exaggerates, and Magnus knows this, but he can’t help but wonder about her words. What he feels for Taako is in the complicated realm of being slightly more than a crush, but it can’t be  _ love _ , not yet. He thinks back to how he’d felt when he’d been with Julia — the comfortable warmth of it all, like his heart was a glowing firefly in his chest, cheesy as that sounds — and no, this doesn’t compare. This is butterflies in the stomach, that’s all.

What worries him, though, is that he thinks it  _ could  _ get to firefly-level. He could very well be falling in love with Taako — Taako, who he’s fake dating, and who agreed to this only for Carey and Killian’s sake (or maybe for free coffee, which Magnus still needs to deliver on), and who has no reason to believe Magnus feels anything more than platonically towards him. Taako, who Magnus has essentially tricked into going out with him — does that make him a shitty person? If he never acts on it, is he good? This is far complicated than it has to be, and his thoughts keep returning to the realization that he  _ could  _ fall in love with Taako. It’s a little terrifying.

Magnus hits the power button on his phone and sets it on the bench beside him just as the door to the classroom opens. Since the room is typically empty on weekends, he’d chosen to work on his painting here rather than in his apartment; the atmosphere here is calmer, with the afternoon light filtering through the shade-covered windows and the smell of oil paint constantly hanging in the air.

“Mango!” He hears the voice before he sees Taako, but it’s distinctive enough that he doesn’t really need to turn around and look. Any peace he’d intended to find here has been a lost cause from the moment his lack of ideas was realized; Taako’s entrance doesn’t change that, just shifts it into a different kind of uncomfortableness. Swapping out Julia’s teasing for Taako’s presence. He dips his brush in paint and lets it hover in the air in front of his canvas, creating the illusion of actually  _ doing something  _ as Taako sits next to him.

Taako immediately leans further into Magnus’ space than is really necessary, an arm resting on Magnus’ shoulder, looking at the blank canvas like he’s contemplating it. “ _ Hmmm, _ ” he says, a finger tapping at his chin. “Y’know, I think this might be the best painting I’ve seen from you.”

“Ha, ha. Funny.” Magnus rolls his eyes.

“I know, right? Fuckin’ comedic genius, right here.”

“Yeah, sure.”

Magnus is more and more aware of Taako still touching him. It’s not like it’s bad, just  _ weird _ — and maybe Taako’s just the kind of friend who’s very touchy, Magnus doesn’t have an issue with that at all, he’s the same way, but —

Well. Are they even friends? Does hanging out  _ once  _ outside of class, under the ruse of a fake double date, count as friendship?

Magnus isn’t sure. He’s not sure about a lot right now, so that’s fine. He’ll deal with it.

He nudges Taako a bit with his elbow, and Taako slides back onto his own bench, but his eyes stay on the blank canvas in front of Magnus. “So, whatcha paintin’, homie?”

“No clue,” Magnus says, honesty slipping forth without a second thought. His paintbrush gestures uselessly in his hand. “I figured I’d come work on the midterm, y’know, get started on it early, but I’ve got no idea what to do.”

Taako gets this  _ look  _ in his eye — a capital-L Look, maybe, Magnus doesn’t know — like he’s just had an idea that’s either brilliant or absolutely terrible, and darts up from his seat and onto the model stand. He drapes himself across it, one leg stuck into the air, one arm dramatically placed across his forehead. 

A beat of silence, then: “Paint me like one of your French girls, Maggie.”

Magnus  _ tries  _ to keep a straight face. Really, he does. But it only takes a few seconds for him to burst out into laughter, unable to hold it together for even a moment longer as Taako grins up at him. Soon, Taako dissolves into giggles, too, and for a few minutes the empty classroom is filled only with the sound of their laughter.

“ _ Fuck _ ,” Taako says, once his laughter has subsided and left them in a comfortable, amused silence. “For realsies, though, if you need something to paint, I am one hundo percent willing to be a model. Like, no problemo.”

“Seriously? You don’t have to—”

“Shhhhh-shh-shh-shh,” Taako cuts him off, and Magnus chuckles nervously. “It’s cool, my dude.”

Magnus can’t help but feel like he’s asking far too much from Taako at this point — but an excuse to spend time with him outside of the pretense of a date isn’t unwelcome. He thinks back to the first class, months ago now, and his first painting of Taako; fond memories put rose-colored glasses on it for sure, but it was a decent painting, and he’d love to be able to compare it to another one of Taako, see how much he’s grown as an artist. He tells himself that’s the only reason this seems like such a good idea, for academic purposes, not for his own selfishness.

He nods, and starts laying out his palette.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bit of a shorter chapter this week, but i have a lot planned for next week's update! some notes:  
> — what magnus doesn't know is that taako is only there because carey stopped him in the hallway and said something like "dude, if you're looking for your bf he's in there" because she's the best friend in the world  
> — we're about 1/3 of the way through this fic! thanks for all your support, guys!  
> — constructive criticism is always welcome! tell me what you like, what you don't like, what you wanna see in future updates.   
> — chat with me on tumblr @ [dealwarlock](http://dealwarlock.tumblr.com)! and if you like my work, consider [buying me a coffee](https://ko-fi.com/A124706).

**Author's Note:**

> some quick notes:  
> — this is my first multichapter fic in a while, so hang with me. gonna try to stick to an every wednesday update schedule.
> 
> — there'll be more actual taako/magnus interaction next chapter, i promise. i've got plans for those two, but magnus and carey are also super important to me so i maybe got a lil carried away with them.
> 
> — re: the art school stuff - magnus and killian are sculpture majors, taako's a photo major, and carey's a cartooning major. taako's a junior, carey and killian are sophomores, and magnus is a freshman (by virtue of taking a few years off before college). (i also feel obligated to say that nude drawing classes aren't actually sexual in any way irl, and i doubt a teacher would ever let a student model for one, but you just _know_ taako would be asking to be the model every single class.)
> 
> — title is from the mountain goats.
> 
> — comments fuel me. constructive criticism is always welcome! also, if anyone feels like beta-ing future chapters for me, let me know!
> 
> — hit me up on tumblr @ [dealwarlock](http://dealwarlock.tumblr.com) if you wanna chat, or if you have any questions about the fic!


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